Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Ladies Afternoon Out


Last Friday, Debbie and I took our Mom on a bit of an adventure..We've been trying to find ways to make her life a bit more fun. For those who don't know, my Mom is in a nursing home in Gig Harbor. She's been there since late February, early March. This summer, we started to find ways to "spring" her for adventures..This was our "grand" adventure. We took her to Sharis for an early meal. Because she struggles with eating utensils, we ordered finger foods. Afterwards, we went to a couple of stores and then back to the nursing home. This was the second time we got to take Mom over the new Narrows Bridge. She got to see it go up but was wanting to go over it again. I have to admit I was nervous about the afternoon, but Debbie wasn't. We got instruction in how to get her in and out of the car, so that helped quite a bit. Mom was pretty tired afterwards. We visited for a little bit after returning her to Manor Care, but she was ready for us to leave.
Watching my parents decline has been hard. I'm not sure how to explain. Part of it is the decline itself, but a lot of it has to do with the change in roles. Debbie and I are in process of parenting oiur parents. Also, when they both go, the thought of not having parents is weird. It's been a process, that's for sure.
There are thoughts of "what if this happens to me?" Part of my Mom's disease has some dementia to it. My Grandma and her sisters all had dementia..I'd be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. It's not something I dwell on, but, I do wonder..
My faith in the Lord is what sustains me through all of this. Going through this in my own strength would be impossible. Having the support of praying friends means everything..One of the things I was able to verbalize recently was the loss of my Mom, or my Mommy....as she was. While not perfect, my Mom has been a rock for me.
My Dad's health is not good either. He is living in an assisted living facility in Tacoma. He goes to see my Mom several times a week. I'm sad for him as his grief for my Mom and for the way things are has consumed him.
Our responses to life circumstances is a choice. Granted, sometimes initial responses are reactions, but I believe overall, we choose how we respond. I choose not to be consumed with that which is wrong in my life. There is so much more that is right!!! God is GOOD!!!!

Monday, October 15, 2007

Lake Chelan


This past weekend was spent at Lake Chelan. Each year my boss takes us on a weekend getaway. Each year we score with a wonderful place and wonderful weather.

This was the view right outside our hotel room.


The fall colors were beautiful in Blewett Pass..







Reg and me at our group dinner


More views outside our door





It was fun hanging out with everyone. I would love to go back during the summer and rent a jet ski!! I'm still waiting for one, Reg!!! The rest of the pictures from the weekend can be seen here.














Monday, October 01, 2007

Retreat

This past weekend I went on a retreat with the ladies from my church and from other churches. It was held in a beautiful home on Whidbey Island..the home is a 10,000 square foot mansion on the water..it was beautiful...you can click here for pictures of both the home and the weekend..

I got there Thursday evening around 7:30ish. It's always fun finding something in the dark, but find it I did..There was a fast going on from 3PM that day to 3PM on Friday. Being diabetic I can't take part in that, so had some snacks..worship was going on in the main room and I could hear it from where I was..It was beautiful...it was free form and it sounded like angels..I missed the first speaker and was disappointed..it was my friend Kelli..in a smaller group we were asked what had brought us to the retreat..Since leaving our old church, I had pulled back from a lot of "churchy" things..I really feel that the Lord is saying "get back in the game." (Not that I think that any of this is a game...but it best describes what I'm trying to say..) I got to sleep around 11:30 on an Aero type bed..it was VERY comfortable..more so than the bed at the Shiloh Inn...

Friday was a beautiful day..it wasn't forcast to be so, but it was..After worship the next two hours were to be spent quiet with the Lord..well...I met a woman, MaryLou who happened to be from Hoodsport..we walked all around the beach and had wonderful conversation..I'm hoping she will be someone in my life later....later as we regrouped, I was with another group of women who prayed for me as I was able to articulate how much I missed my Mom..or more accurately, I miss my Mommy...It is hard to see my Mom in her current state..My mother is still alive, but my "mommy" is not..I hope that makes sense..I have also felt a sense of abandonment with my sister's impending move back to Ketchikan..I have not been able to be emotionally supportive in their project. I am afraid of being the "main" kid for my parents.. In another quiet time, I was working on a Bible Study I'm involved with and something I read clicked...it was perfect..it has allowed me to emotionally let go of my sister and to honestly be on board with what they are doing..Another woman I met the night before sought me out and we had a good discussion on legalism and such..she is not happy in her marriage..she's been married for 39 years (I think) with kids ranging in age from 12 to 34..I feel so fortunate..I have been truly happily married for 24 years..Thank you Lord for Reg..he has loved me unconditionally for all these years and has modeled the love of our Lord to me..too many of my friends are not happily married and I find it so sad.

Finally at 3PM the food came out..while I hadn't fasted, I was eating small things to keep my blood sugars at an ok level..Friday night was a salad potluck..My contribution was guacamole, at Diane's request..it didn't last long! :) We had more worship and speakers and group time..it was all wonderful..I was most definitely ready for bed by 10PM...

Saturday came and more wonderful worship and word..I found as the time to go home drew nearer, I wanted to stay..it was a nice feeling...I think it was partly the physical surroundings, but mostly the Lord was so prevalent there..

I left at 5PM in order to catch the 6PM ferry to Port Townsend. It was running late due to the windy weather..it took 2 tries to dock the boat and the second one was pretty rough..the drive home in the dark and wet on Hwy. 101 was not what I would call fun..but I made it home!

It was a wonderful weekend that opened up a sense of freedom in worship for me. I didn't play in any of the worship sessions, I just got to partake and it was such a gift. On Sunday, the freedom continued at church and seemed to be contagious..it was great!!